The Wee Democracy

weddings shmeddings

now there's absolutely no disputing my place in the annals of american immaturity. i've said numerous times that i'm simply a 23 year old, slightly better coordinated and hairier infant. if i had the resources, i'd hire a nanny. but i don't think it is the natural immaturity that swings me in a radically different direction than that which ends up in my marching up an aisle in a penguin suit (though i do like quite dapper in said garb), wondering who the hell it is that i'm committing to live my life with.

no kidding, i once had this fucked up dream where i was being dragged to my wedding by my cousins (both married) and other assorted peripheral family members. and i was saying, "no! this is a mistake! i don't even know this girl! i can't marry her!" and the thing was, it wasn't hyperbole. i had no freakin' clue in bright blue heaven who the hell i was gonna marry. i walked down the aisle, hoping that i wasn't betrothed to some slightly younger bea arthur type. or worse, a christian.

and i'm really not sure if i'm down on marriage as an institution, or rather one that seems to be finding a handful of my friends quicker than perhaps i'd like, or at least, be able to accept. maybe when i get older i can understand it better, but now? nopers.

i knew six couples in college who knew they were gonna get married. 3 broke up. one got married, and the other two are in the purgatorial state of dreamlike horror some call engagement. but being their friend, you can't say anything about it. you can't say, dude, or dudette, as each individual case warrants, you're making a mistake. maybe not a terrible one, but if nothing else you're being a tad short sighted.

the one married person i know, whom i knew as a single person but never without this beard, entered into this marriage wholeheartedly convinced of it's rightness. and the thing is, she didn't marry a bad guy. he's not mean or an ass, or even immature. he's just...boring...as...i dunno, trying to decipher the pros and cons to round toothpicks over square ones. just a humorless motherfucker, basically.

and what am i supposed to do? say, dudette, don't do this! take some time, see the world, meet other guys!! no, i can't. can't do that.

i don't think i can imagine getting married before like, 28.

or maybe all of this is just me being pissed at being dateless for vince's nuptials